I gotta go meditate. Or masturbate. Or both.
Trevor Phillips - Grand Theft Auto V“That was too close, you were almost a Jill sandwich.”
Barry Burton - Resident Evil 1I never asked for this.
Adam Jensen - Deus Ex: Human RevolutionI don’t have time to explain why I don’t have time to explain.
The Stranger - DestinyClickity click click. Right on the money. Shootin’ blanks every time. All the time.
Defective Turret - Portal 2“War… War never changes!”
Narrator(Ron Perlman) - Fallout 3I pooped right where you’re standing.
Claptrap - Borderlands Game of the Year Edition EnhancedHard to see big picture behind the pile of corpses.
Prof. Mordin Solus - Mass Effect 2Nothing is true, everything is permitted.
Altair - Assassin’s CreedLook behind you, a Three-Headed Monkey!
Guybrush Threepwood - Secret of Monkey Island, TheWhenever I smell asphalt, I think of Maureen…
Ben - Full Throttle“We all make choices, but in the end, our choices… make… us.”
Andrew Ryan - BioShock“I had a permanent constipated grimace on my face. I was revenge personified.”
Dick Justice - Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max PayneGo for the eyes, Boo. Go for the eyes.
Minsc - Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of AmnStay a while and listen.
Decard Cain - Diablo IIThat reminds me of the first shotgun I got when I was a kid, I was the happiest 4 year old in the county.
Haggard - Battlefield: Bad CompanyLike all the bad things in my life, it started with the death of a woman.
Max Payne - Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max PayneAnd so our story begins.
Narrator - Fable IIThe cake is a lie!!!
Doug Rattmann - Orange Box, TheOh. Hi. So. How are you holding up? BECAUSE I’M A POTATO.
GladOS - Portal 2Look behind you!
- PTMay you find your worth in the waking world.
Doll - BloodborneYou monster!
GladOS - Portal 2You know I never really thought about it, Rico but there’s a difference between you LOOK and you SEE. You look at Medici, she’s beautiful. She’s a jewel in the sun. But you see Medici, she’s completely rotten.
Mario Frigo - Just Cause 3It’s not the fall that kills you, it’s the sudden stop at the bottom.
Richard B. Riddick - Chronicles of Riddick: Escape From Butcher BayI was an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee.
Various - Elder Scrolls V, The: SkyrimThis place was like Baghdad with g-strings.
Max Payne - Max Payne 3Look at you, soaring through the air like an eagle… piloting a blimp.
GladOS - Portal 2You spoony bard!
Tellah - Final Fantasy IVThis town had more smoke and mirrors than a strip club locker room.
Max Payne - Max Payne 3It’s like pornography or the perfect turd, I can’t describe it, but I’ll know it when I see it.
Trevor Phillips - Grand Theft Auto VI’ll relinquish one bullet. Where do you want it?
Commander Shephard - Mass Effect 2I’m looking for a place where sailors hang out.
Ryo Hazuki - ShenmueYou have died of dysentery.
- Oregon TrailI don’t need an army, I’ve got a Krogan
Ryder - Mass Effect: AndromedaIn a world without gold, we could have been heroes.
Blackbeard - Assassin’s Creed IV: Black FlagThank you Mario! But our Princess is in another castle!
Toad - Super Mario Bros.Do a barrel roll!
Peppy - Star FoxYour face, your ass – what’s the difference?
Duke Nukem - Duke Nukem 3DI’m no hero. Never was, never will be. I’m just an old killer, hired to do some wet work.
Solid Snake - Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the PatriotsI’m the monster in the closet.
Sam Fisher - Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell: Chaos TheoryYou are all things, Revan… and yet you are nothing. In the end, you belong to neither the light nor the darkness. You will forever stand alone.
Darth Malak - Star Wars: Knights of the Old RepublicRise if you would. For that is our curse.
Prince Lothric - Dark Souls IIII’d been sitting at the bar for three hours, or five years depending on the way you looked at things.
Max Payne - Max Payne 3“Nothing is true, everything is permitted.”
Altair - Assassin’s CreedDo you think love can bloom, even on a battlefield?
Otacon - Metal Gear SolidYou Died!
- Dark SoulsIt’s fear that gives men wings!
Max Payne - Max PayneLife, dreams, hope, where do they come from? And where do they go? Such meaningless things, I’ll destroy them all!
Kefka - Final Fantasy VIDid I ever tell you the definition of insanity?
Vaas - Far Cry 3“A man chooses, a slave obeys.”
Andrew Ryan - BioShock“Prepare for unforeseen consequences.”
G-Man - Orange Box, TheWell done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I’m serious, that’s what it says: “A horrible person.”
GladOS - Portal 2“Would you kindly…”
Various - BioShockI uh, don’t have any bullets. You gonna give me bullets? Are there bullets up there? Where do I get my gun?
Defective Turret - Portal 2“Wake up Mr Freeman, Wake up and.. Smell the Ashes.”
G-Man - Orange Box, The“The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.”
G-Man - Orange Box, The“Who wants toast?”
Marcus Fenix - Gears of War 2