This place was like Baghdad with g-strings.

The cake is a lie!!!

Look at you, soaring through the air like an eagle… piloting a blimp.

I pooped right where you’re standing.

Like all the bad things in my life, it started with the death of a woman.

I’m the monster in the closet.

“Would you kindly…”

“I had a permanent constipated grimace on my face. I was revenge personified.”

Rise if you would. For that is our curse.

“Wake up Mr Freeman, Wake up and.. Smell the Ashes.”

“Prepare for unforeseen consequences.”

“The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.”

Your face, your ass – what’s the difference?

“That was too close, you were almost a Jill sandwich.”

Stay a while and listen.

Thank you Mario! But our Princess is in another castle!

I uh, don’t have any bullets. You gonna give me bullets? Are there bullets up there? Where do I get my gun?

I’ll relinquish one bullet. Where do you want it?

And so our story begins.

You Died!

Nothing is true, everything is permitted.

I don’t need an army, I’ve got a Krogan

“Nothing is true, everything is permitted.”

“We all make choices, but in the end, our choices… make… us.”

I gotta go meditate. Or masturbate. Or both.

I was an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee.

That reminds me of the first shotgun I got when I was a kid, I was the happiest 4 year old in the county.

Clickity click click. Right on the money. Shootin’ blanks every time. All the time.

I don’t have time to explain why I don’t have time to explain.

Do you think love can bloom, even on a battlefield?

It’s fear that gives men wings!

I never asked for this.

It’s like pornography or the perfect turd, I can’t describe it, but I’ll know it when I see it.

This town had more smoke and mirrors than a strip club locker room.

In a world without gold, we could have been heroes.

“War… War never changes!”

It’s not the fall that kills you, it’s the sudden stop at the bottom.

You spoony bard!

Hard to see big picture behind the pile of corpses.

Oh. Hi. So. How are you holding up? BECAUSE I’M A POTATO.

Did I ever tell you the definition of insanity?

Look behind you!

Look behind you, a Three-Headed Monkey!

I’m no hero. Never was, never will be. I’m just an old killer, hired to do some wet work.

Whenever I smell asphalt, I think of Maureen…

Go for the eyes, Boo. Go for the eyes.

“A man chooses, a slave obeys.”

I’d been sitting at the bar for three hours, or five years depending on the way you looked at things.

Do a barrel roll!

You monster!

Life, dreams, hope, where do they come from? And where do they go? Such meaningless things, I’ll destroy them all!

You have died of dysentery.

“Who wants toast?”

May you find your worth in the waking world.

Well done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I’m serious, that’s what it says: “A horrible person.”

I’m looking for a place where sailors hang out.

You know I never really thought about it, Rico but there’s a difference between you LOOK and you SEE. You look at Medici, she’s beautiful. She’s a jewel in the sun. But you see Medici, she’s completely rotten.

You are all things, Revan… and yet you are nothing. In the end, you belong to neither the light nor the darkness. You will forever stand alone.